Have you made your New Year’s Resolutions yet? I haven’t, but at least I managed to write a new poem about all the lazy things I did instead:
TARDY RESOLUTIONS 2013
January second, and I haven’t made my resolutions yet.
Maybe it’s too late to bother. Too late to make it to the Y
in time for Nia, but for exercise I walked my dog
beside the lake, where he adorned the roadside
with an humongous turd too mushy for doggy bags.
I buried it with frozen clumps of grungy snow
left by the plow. So much for “Love thy neighbor.”
Back home I weighed myself, discovered I’d been ambushed
by four new pounds in just four days, crawled back in bed
and ate the raspberry strudel left from New Year’s brunch.
The sugar knocked me out. I fell asleep,
cuddling with my cat Lunesta, named for my favorite sleeping pills.
Waking at last, I slugged down coffee, gorged on leftover lox and bagels,
read the morning paper with its daily dose of mayhem – a murdered nun,
a stampede killing dozens after New Year’s fireworks in Africa –
then stole an hour blotting out the news with Spider solitaire.
Now it’s high noon. I’ve blown the best of day,
but no one will know, since my husband’s away,
unless I confess to this surfeit of sloth
by posting this poem as my latest blog,
owning up to the deadly sin of wallowing
in total torpor. Shaming myself in public, flaunting
a scarlet L for laziness, for lassitude, an F for everything
I failed to do last year.
I know – I’ll take it from the top,
watch the midnight ball drop one more time in rerun,
erase this lackadaisical beginning
and make those resolutions bright and early,
trusting in tomorrow, praying for time.
I’ve only wasted one more day of life.
Last night the famed Caffe Lena in Saratoga Springs (where Bob Dylan, Arlo Guthrie and countless others played on their way up) had its first poetry open mic of the New Year, and having the chance to read this poem there was a major motivator. People seemed to love it – at least they laughed a lot. The Capital Region’s poetry community is a wonderfully welcoming bunch of folks who are always generous with their applause. It’s great to be able to write something, then try it out on stage the same night.
How do you feel about New Year’s resolutions? Do you make them, and if so, do they help you work toward your goals? Or do they just make you feel guilty?